Father and son, Jim Fay and Charles Fay, wrote Love and Logic Magic… together. I don’t think this is the first in the series, and since it was published in 2000, it may not even be the last.
Unlike most books, I requested this as a tutorial for myself in dealing with my 4 and 1 1/2 year olds. And much like I expected there wasn’t a whole lot of new information contained in this book. That doesn’t mean that it wasn’t helpful. What I mean is that this book has a lot of common sense approaches to dealing with children. A lot of which I feel I know, but lose in the heat of battle. Yes, I am comparing raising young children to being in a constant battle.
What I liked about this book is the simplicity and the structure that you can use in almost every situation. It was a good reminder that I’m raising my children not just to be good children, but to be good teenagers (scary thought!) and adults.
Of course there’s a lot of horror stories about children misbehaving at the worst time, which always gives me the self satisfaction of “well at least that one isn’t mine.” But parenting is also about feeling alone at the worst of times when someones screaming at you at the top of their lungs, the exact moment that its hard to think calmly and clearly. This technique is more about training the adults to act like the adults and give us repetition so that we don’t forget what to say at the moment. So that the adult can be calm and clear and most important consistent. All of which will benefit the children as well as the parents.
The point is to stop treating the tantrums as battles and let them be learning experiences. I like this in theory so far, we’ll see what happens in practice.
Read February 2013